VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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