I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize