this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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