is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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