So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
