Betty ford says i'm here all night
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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