i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
false alarm, still single
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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