He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
i think my cat just said my name.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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