we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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