If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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