Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize