community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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