But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
