Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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