I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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