I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
