apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
