Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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