lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
