do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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