Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
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