Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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