i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Church boner. Awkwardddd
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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