Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
