No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
