your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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