I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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