We're facebook friends in real life
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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