White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I'm getting married
To pizza
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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