i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
