woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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