I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
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Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
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You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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