Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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