question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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