I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize