i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
