i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
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