..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize