Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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