About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
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