I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
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