My pussy is not your playground.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
