pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
How external is "for external use only"?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
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