do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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