i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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