I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
