Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
