She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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