we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
