I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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